tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-302767455915995629.post1880183143277807748..comments2024-01-17T05:33:20.530-08:00Comments on Dan, in real time.: Family FeudUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-302767455915995629.post-20081232102991766472010-08-12T09:09:34.243-07:002010-08-12T09:09:34.243-07:00Oh, Dan .... my heart goes out to you. I, too, ha...Oh, Dan .... my heart goes out to you. I, too, have a 16 year old son and an 18 year old son still at home (plus 4 older ones either in school or on their own). I have heard these same words and I have thought these same thoughts. Jim, too, was the calm voice in our family. I hate (and sometimes resent) having to do this parenting thing on my own. I totally didn't sign up for it! But .... here we are.<br />And we will get through it. Won't we?!<br />:)Janinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00949809367923657970noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-302767455915995629.post-55577647714230463122010-08-11T17:17:51.317-07:002010-08-11T17:17:51.317-07:00Thanks for the insights Cadi. It's good to be ...Thanks for the insights Cadi. It's good to be reminded that while teenagers appear to be young adults who can dish it out, they are actually older kids who are scared as hell. <br /><br />Thanks again.Danhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02218009891182171803noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-302767455915995629.post-84155576232417373152010-08-11T07:50:10.027-07:002010-08-11T07:50:10.027-07:00Someone recently told me that teenagers have more ...Someone recently told me that teenagers have more weapons to dish out with than they have mechanisms to cope with what's coming at them. That has helped me have more compassion for teenager anger/angst in general. Anger often comes out when the underlying feeling is, "I'm afraid."<br /><br />The relationship with my boy-friend was the first opportunity for my children to see the presence of an affectionate, healthy relationship between two people. They have thus probably lost more than I can imagine at a time when they are seeking a sense of who they are; their identity. <br /><br />I know you mentioned a recent move. As adults we sometimes have the need to "start over" whereas children often find comfort in maintaining what is familiar. I imagine it is thus a difficult time on many fronts for your teenage son. <br /><br />I have no advice on the Playstation. We haven't owned a TV in over 8 years & the laptop time my children have is limited to weekends. :-)Cadihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14517775140048055244noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-302767455915995629.post-28477225129670092142010-08-10T07:25:54.504-07:002010-08-10T07:25:54.504-07:00I completely relate to this, Dan. I get so frustr...I completely relate to this, Dan. I get so frustrated with my youngest son's anger, yet I know my anger lies right at the surface and too often rears its ugly head. I find it difficult to know if his anger is just teenage anger or if it's grief. And why can't my kids just do what I ask them to do????????? Argghhhh!! We head home tomorrow morning and life returns to the new normal. Looking forward to it and slightly dreading it all at the same time..... Hope your appology this morning is sincere and your kids do everything you ask them to today :)<br /><br />(By the way, loved the Family Feud format!!!)Debbiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13743446066024389563noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-302767455915995629.post-14863363936471508592010-08-10T04:52:21.722-07:002010-08-10T04:52:21.722-07:00Of course I know, and you know, that anger is alwa...<i>Of course I know, and you know, that anger is always just below the surface with me. Most of the time I am able to control it. Yet, I am also aware that I can't possibly do all this on my own, while grieving the loss of Michael, without letting my anger get the best of me.</i><br /><br />Well, that's the hardest part in all of this. Situations that spark anger are very hard to deal with when you're already so angry underneath. I was very much in that state last summer around this time when the sale of my house was finally reaching the point of going through. My agent, who was also an old friend, said he was going to save some of my emails as they were hilarious. I remember writing things like, "Well, they can go to hell. I'd rather have the house sit empty until next spring!" The other thing I had some problems with were house guests who acted weird and drove me nuts. I am usually so laid back and can tolerate just about anything, but until very recently, my lack of control over my temper has made it difficult to have anyone around me for more than a day or two. That's about my limit on graciousness. I seem to be past that though.. had a good visit with the couchsurfer from France. Maybe I'm finally healing enough to be more like my old self. It sure does take a long time to feel anywhere near <i>normal</i> again though. I think we underestimate just how long it takes to begin to heal.bevhttp://magickcanoe.com/blog11noreply@blogger.com